Friday 1 November 2013

Bang, crash, lawsuit


You've got to admire the moxie (or balls - topical reference) of the Australian broad who injured herself during an 'adult situation' and attempted to sue her employer because it happened on a business trip.

Having painstakingly pieced together the various bits of forensic evidence, it appears that in the throes of passion with a 'colleague' (make of that what you will), she managed to rip a light fitting off a wall which promptly twatted her in the face.  Lips were bust, eyes were blacked and one would presume coitus was suspended, unless she's into that kind of thing.

Initially, she actually got compensation, until the High Court's Pisstaking Division got involved and told her to turn it in.  Her employer quite rightly insisted that her actions, whilst carried out during a business trip, were not actually part of her role with the company, and anything she does on her own time is none of their concern.  Quite how she got from 'I can't believe I've just done that' to 'Well, this is clearly the company's fault - heads are gonna roll' is anyone's guess, and her unflinching brazenness in bringing this into the public domain has to be applauded.  Win, lose or draw, she's managed to drag her own reputation through the muck in the process, making her unemployable at best, a misguided harlot at worst.

Thankfully, her case being thrown out prevented the setting of any precedence, where any Tom, Dick (arf) or Harry would start filing nuisance lawsuits because they'd trapped their bell end in a trouser press, or got into a compromising situation with a Filipino chamber maid for whom 'no' really does mean 'no'.  Hopefully she'll think twice the next time she gets herself into this situation (cos you know she will).  My advice would be to test the structural integrity of the room before beginning any shenanigans.  That, and to record the whole event.  That way, if it all goes to plan, you've got a romantic keepsake, but if chaos ensues, you can send it in to You've Been Framed for a grand (I know, a grand!).