Big cock day

People who know me will also know that I subscribe to the notion of the big cock day. That is, a day when you feel sexually irresistable to the opposite sex and feel that you're being checked out wherever you go.

Now let's get one thing straight. I don't profess to be a stud (our lass would go up the wall for starters) but I'm not exactly David Mellor, so there's bound to be some people out there not completely physically repulsed by me. Therefore, I don't feel bad when I get the impression that the 48-year-old battleaxe at Tescos petrol station is thinking "If I were 25 years younger"

I'm not arrogant. I'm confident, mainly because I'm secure in my own skin and have got what I want from life, but I would never profess to be some kind of player who's beating them off with a stick. It's just sometimes I feel absolutely the dog's bollocks, sex-wise.

The opposite is of course true. Sometimes everywhere you look the women are fit. It happened today which reminded me to write this blog. On another day we'd be talking swamp donkey territory, but sometimes, be it madness, celibacy or plain old cataracts, the opposite gender look like a collective of pieces of ass.

Far be it from me to get all Desmond Morris on your ass, but I'd say that's human nature. Personally I don't care whether you agree with me or not, cos I'm one of the beautiful people. Fall silent at my handsome feet.