11 years too late, but still...

So Channel 4 have finally decided to bin that stinking pile of uber-shite Big Brother? Good bloody riddance.

When it started, the first series had a novelty appeal. I didn't watch it (although I caught the final in a pub) but you could understand why people were interested in it. Genuine people were slung into a house and watched, while their arguments and emotions were played out for the voyeuristic viewers. Not my cup of char, but if it lights your candle, go for it girl.

The thing is, after that, C4 were like "Hold up, this is taking off big-style. Maybe, instead of sticking to this format though, we fill the house will a series of ill-monikered goons, socially-retarded wannabees and scantily-clad nork-merchants to titillate our clearly idiotic fanbase. Then, we'll employ some skinny blokes with concerning fashion tastes to discuss the goings-on in the house like a Jeremy Kyle-version of The Big Question. That'll be ace"

And lo, said ideas were actioned, and for the last decade we've been subjected to the likes of Jady Goody (RIP, Queen of our hearts), that Chantelle woman and John Tickle. Really, are any of these people actually worth the skin they inhabit? They're no-marks of the highest order yet because they spent 6 weeks sat on their arse in a house, they are thrust into the limelight while every facet of their sex and social life is plastered across the newspapers, usually by a plumber named Dave who used to shag one of them.

The idea of it being an interesting social experiment died when they started taking themselves so seriously, employing old Bignose to tell us how important it was, and how interesting the folk in the house were. You could argue that she was spectacularly missing the point; that people who invest any kind of emotion or time in the plights of these skanks were somehow the right-thinking in this society. Don't get me wrong, I'm not blaming the BB producers for tapping into the culture of brainless voyeurism that blights our televisual treats these days, but to make it look like the must-see show across the summer is at least worrying, at best irresponsible. Yes, dip in every now and then to see them having a scrap of showering together, but don't stop up all night watching them sleep on an infra-red camera. That's just gay.

Sadly, the rumour is that another station will pick up the franchise and eek even more mileage from it, despite the fact that it ceased to be a good idea in 2002. Naturally I won't be tuning in, nor will I be picking on the people who like it to any great degree. Despite what you read above, I genuinely don't care. I just find it fascinating how much effort and airtime goes into covering a dozen unemployed, intellectually-challenged individuals arguing for 2 months.

I just hope McCall doesn't find herself at a loose end and fronts another series of her dreadful chat show. That really would be a tragedy for TV. Cheers.