The thing what makes juggling look worthwhile

I've done it. I've found something more pointless than being a skilled juggler or participating in Secret Santa.

Regional news teams being on FaceBook. What's the fucking point in that?

Let's not dress it up - Look North is bollocks. A series of poorly-dressed, comically-alternative buffoons traipse across the length and breadth of Yorkshire finding interesting stories, before discarding them and telling us about how many jobs have been lost this week or that a giraffe saved the life of a penguin at a zoo. All presented with the journalistic finesse of a pub fight.

Their latest brainwave is to put themselves on that FaceBook, and in some cases, the Twitter. Apparently there must be people interested in getting behind the scenes on this great denizen of broadcasting to learn about what these simple folk like to eat for tea, or their opinions on lifesaving giraffes. How else can you explain this bunch of nerds promoting their pages at every touch and turn during broadcasts?

Now, it's been said I have something of a cynical streak, but surely I can't be the only one expecting these pages to become the sounding board for a series of violent and/or sexual threats against these fine folk? There are a couple of (borrowing from modern parlance) stick-on honies on the staff who will surely be subjected to the combined sexual force of a myriad middle-aged men with tattoos called Sean who deem such flirtatious behaviour appropriate.

Then there's those correspondents whose job it is to tell us about the latest inbred half-wit who's been sent down for smuggling drugs or sedating their own child in a bizarre kidnap plot. Surely relatives of those cell-friendly morons will pass on their well-considered thoughts about how it's not fair or unjust or bang out of fucking order, and how if you ever come round our end again will stab you to death or kick you to death or get you in a headlock to death. Clearly, putting your details online is only asking for trouble.

My own personal ire is that it's all a bit wanky. These are not celebrities (in any sense), nor are they particularly interesting (in any sense). Or famous. They are merely the purveyors of other people's misfortune who have decided to jump on the latest e-bandwagon on some vain quest for popularity. And the sooner these goons realise we're not even remotely interested in them aside from the occasional upskirt shot or sideboob action, the better, says I.